I remember the first few times somebody made those comments about Bella being "strong willed". It's always a negative thing. It's a nice way of saying your child is difficult and hard to enjoy. I remember being so upset when it was said. It was in the nursery at church, where I was still new and getting to know people. I was also still new to the whole motherhood thing, where comments taken negatively are almost always funneled back into yourself as a mother.
"Strong willed???" I remember thinking. "She's 11 months old! Strong willed?! This person doesn't even know my child. How can they say that about her?" I vented, ranted and fussed about it every time to Palmer, who also furrowed his brow in response. He didn't take it nearly as negatively as I did.
I started to grow slightly more comfortable with the term as she blossomed and grew into a little lady whose longing for independence and passion to do what she feels is right was more and more apparent. I found that learning to let her be herself and not stifle those beautiful qualities were what would make ALL of our lives not only pleasant but immensely more rewarding. Lucky for me, I'm not a parent who likes telling her what to do or needs her to simply obey when I tell her to do something. We have a lot of discussions around here, more than I have the energy for half of the time. She doesn't do much of anything without knowing why and if she doesn't agree, she lets me know. This is not to say I have anything perfected, just that I learned what worked for us and how I learned to parent Bella ( so far).
My mom recently shared a link with me about parenting strong willed children. It wasn't written with any negative language at all. In fact, I read it and was proud. I was already proud of those qualities I mentioned, but to have an article tell me why made me even more happy.
http://www.ahaparenting.com/parenting-tools/positive-discipline/Parenting-Strong-Willed-Child
I am so proud of my strong willed, big hearted, daughter of integrity who does not succumb to peer pressure and chases her dreams with all her heart. Well, so the article predicts. If you hung around Bella for a few days, you may likely agree. :)
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